Aug 31, 2010
Writer's Block
Decided to collage about my writing block and it looks like it is in a good place and will return...someday.
Aug 14, 2010
Apoptosis
I am watching a movie called The Killing Room. The description is an MK-Ultra project shelved for 20 years and then being conducted by a "diabolical" psychiatrist. Toward the end of the movie, the word "apoptosis" is used. I immediately looked it up. Here is the definition:
As I read the definition, I could easily substitute the word "alter" in place of "cell". I've said many times that I had suicide programming at every level of healing. I had no idea the objective was for the self to mimic a natural cell process of elimination.
The movie explains they are looking for civilians guaranteed to take the lives of others and sacrifice their own lives "for the greater good"...civilian weapons.
At the end of the movie, it was not about the subjects themselves who were destined to perish at the end of the "voluntary experiment", but to test the new doctor hired by MK-Ultra to make sure she could ignore her conscience and allow the harm, torture, and killing to proceed without her intervention.
I watch these movies now in hopes of finding answers to my own life. Mostly they just justify the notion of lack of empathy, remorse, and conscience in the name of "freedom".
Apoptosis
The genetically programmed death of cells at specific times during embryogenesis, metamorphosis, and during cell turnover in adults.As I read the definition, I could easily substitute the word "alter" in place of "cell". I've said many times that I had suicide programming at every level of healing. I had no idea the objective was for the self to mimic a natural cell process of elimination.
The movie explains they are looking for civilians guaranteed to take the lives of others and sacrifice their own lives "for the greater good"...civilian weapons.
At the end of the movie, it was not about the subjects themselves who were destined to perish at the end of the "voluntary experiment", but to test the new doctor hired by MK-Ultra to make sure she could ignore her conscience and allow the harm, torture, and killing to proceed without her intervention.
I watch these movies now in hopes of finding answers to my own life. Mostly they just justify the notion of lack of empathy, remorse, and conscience in the name of "freedom".
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