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If you are a first time visitor to this blog, I invite you to start from the beginning, especially if you are unfamiliar with the potential emotional impact of long-term child abuse.

Trigger caution to unhealed survivors!

Understanding the Incomprehensible

Children of incest or long-term sexual abuse grow up to be wounded adults with complicated emotional issues. Unfortunately, some symptoms are misinterpreted or often dismissed as "crazy", only serving to maintain a tormented victim status. We, as a society, have the power to change this dynamic. Each of us can make a difference.

Feb 21, 2009

Unpeeling layers of programming

Poppy Revealed
Poppy Revealed - by grace2244 on Polyvore.com

I just completed a rather sophisticated view of what was beneath the cyclone spin program--a visual of how it works. The collage above is related; I didn't want to post the operational collage because it is potentially triggering--spin inducing. One of the reasons I know I'm completely healed from this very large program that ran my life, is I have not been dizzy while doing all the collages. During healing, I would sometimes be non-stop dizzy for several days if I got close to it. Undoing it took several attempts over the course of several years.

In sharing what I'm learning through the cooperation of all my healed parts, perhaps therapists can see a kind of basic blueprint if survivors run into the opposite gender identity system. Mostly it is overwhelming spinning which means lots of time by abusers placing survivors in or on objects that would literally spin us around.

I've set up a collection under my Polyvore page called Dandelion Flip System. If you choose to view the photos, just know much spinning is represented. I want this information to help undo some of the horrendous backlash of getting near it. Maybe knowing these layers and double language can help shorten your unraveling and stopping of the program.

The collage above is by an alter named Poppy whose job related to dandy "lions" (Wizard of Oz). But she identifies with having Tin Man programming. The male system is represented by peacock feathers which are kind of self explanatory. Much double language was used. I certainly don't know if my double language was the same as everyone else's, but likely at least some survivors share great similarities because of abusers rarely doing something different.

If you click on the collage name, it will take you to the collage on the Polyvore website. Then click on grace2244 and scroll down to my Collections. If you click on my name, just click on the collections for this particular set of collages related to the same intense programming. Please take precautions before viewing the images if you are not completely healed.

It is my belief this was the main basis of my system(s)...the primary on/off switch for my conscious self. If we could all stop that one, we could get away many years sooner...I would think. Be gentle with yourselves, please.

2 comments:

JAGA said...

Your twitter about Wizard of Oz programming brought us to this page. I wasn't able to really look at the collage (not ready yet), but I was reading what you wrote about it.

I freaked when I read that you have an alter named, Poppy. So do I/we. I only know that she can put our entire system to sleep and selectively choose which ones inside are to remain active. Oh yeah and she can fly. There was some written about it a few years ago, but I don't recall much about it. It is frightening in a way and validating in another way to hear of someone else having an alter with the same name with a similar purpose.

I know very little about Poppy in our system other than I recall getting an energy vibe that she was very high on the inner hierarchy. Anyway, I'm not sure if anything else is similar between Poppy in our system and Poppy in your system. I just don't know.

Also, about the Operational College: Just the name of it makes us immediately think of what we call The Function Keys in our system. They have very operational functions. I've learned a little bit about them in the past year. They are all programmed with specific jobs. Anyway--would like to email you more but need to find your email or something. Sorry.

Thank you for having the courage to share these things. We continue to debate internally as to whether to really reveal a lot of inner system structure, programming, name background, etc. Your bravery and sharing encourages us to tell and share more too.

JAGA
(JAGA Harmony) working on the harmony

Grace said...

I had thought that my alter names were not the names given to them by abusers but ones my protector gave them to help me. But the name Poppy obviously did help me. Can you twitter me a direct message with your email? Or DM me and I'll send you my email? I haven't been checking on Twitter lately but prommise to respond as soon as I can.